I know nothing about dating, online or offline or otherwise... but...
I think I know something about dating algorithm.
The online dating industry spends an unlimited budget on coming up with a better matching algorithm. They collect hundreds of variables and attempt to predict the match success rate. They have millions and millions of user-candidate pairs who feed them data and $ dues. It's a highly lucrative data and revenue-rich business. The algorithm is measured by the success of the suggested match, and the success is defined as whether the matched pairs contacted each other.
One approach to understanding the dating relationship is to use the Network topology. It is the arrangement of a network, including its nodes and connecting lines. There are two ways of defining network geometry: the physical topology and the logical (or signal) topology. This is one way of visualizing how we might stack our friends. And friend-candidates.
We can see the node connections, but they do not tell us the flow direction and strength of each connection.
The flow direction can be
Outbound centric
Inbound centric or
Bi-directional
And the connection can be powerful or weak in a
symmetrical or
asymmetrical way
A server is powerful both ways; outbound and inbound. The clients are not. Most clients and their internet connection may need powerful download speed, but just a weak upload speed would be fine. The server pushes out information, and the clients receive it.
Peer to Peer (P2P) is unique in that the client act as both server and client.
Suppose node A wants to talk to node B. But cannot connect directly. A will ask a root server C who is also a root server to B to make a handshake. C will relay A's message to B. If all goes well C will step back, and A and B will start talking to each other. This is how p2p works. If A and B can not p2p connect, C will continue to relay for A and B while periodically pinging A and B to direct connect because C really rather make the first introduction and step back. The first widely popular p2p application was Napster around 1999. In my experience, early p2p applications were bad news for the network. A network router with hundreds of people working nicely would be brought down by a single user on Napster or Limewire. Stronger the DNS filtering, port blocking, and firewall got, cleverer the DNS proxy and UDP hole punching got. Traffic shaping by mac address? Hello, mac spoofing. So most of older computer workers have a bad memory of p2p. That p2p is a resource hog and network buster. p2p works ok now, but only because we have phat broadband. p2p's true problem hasn't been fixed.
It may be true in a human relationship too. The 'connectors' in human society fulfills the role of root server C. The connectors make it their business to know everyone and keep a constant tap on what they are doing. It is easier to meet people through an introduction rather than on your own. Only brave or naive would make an attempt to introduce themselves.
A connection relayed through a group is usually organized and configuration-free. It is easy to meet people by joining a group. The group, usually for a small fee, takes care of the awkwardness in communication and logistics. Then p2p or one-on-one relation can be cultivated if so desired.
As a simple rule, we can define low, medium and high powerful friends. If anyone is sending out high-quality messages others want to hear, they are powerful. Anyone who is a consumer of those messages is medium powerful. Anyone who is not receptive to such messages is low power. This is the world we live in today. That is why rappers and YouTubers are celebrated. They are powerful.
A twitter account holder in 1600 Pennsylvania Ave, Washington D.C. understands this. This is why a nerd playing an online game in mom's basement does not have the reach. And this is why your parents told you to go and make friends.
What about the connectors? They live on the borrowed space between the servers and clients with no real content of their own. I guess they took unite people seriously.
